Am I invisible? Get your voice heard!

Third in line I waited patiently until it was finally my turn to talk to one of the speakers at an engineering event. He was very charming and engaging and we were just getting to business when this huge 'honey monster' of a man (really - he was HUGE!) came out of nowhere, started talking to the speaker, with not even a glance in my direction.

I was quite taken aback. The speaker looked at me and I looked at him. I put my hands up and shrugged and made a joke about being 'cut in' and he smiled and said he would talk to me later.

I really, really did want to speak to him, so later when I saw he had been talking to two men for quite a while I joined them. The speaker saw me. I waited. I moved to stand where the other two men could see me. They saw me (I was wearing a shocking pink cardigan). I waited… and waited…

Finally I stepped forward and said, “Excuse me, I was interrupted earlier and I have been waiting patiently.  Now I would really like the chance to speak to this man”.

Not long after I was at a professional networking event. I was chatting to a client of mine and a friend of his joined us. After the initial polite introductions they chatted amongst themselves - about the course they had been on together. And then about rugby… the teams they coached, and on and on.

I decided to do a little experiment and wait and see how long it would take them to involve me in their conversation.

They never once even glanced in my direction. I moved on.

I am sure you have experienced something similar. For example, I hear many women talk about presenting something at a meeting, for it to be ignored. When a man presents the same thing a few minutes later suddenly it gets attention.

So how do you have your voice heard without being rude and inconsiderate? How do you stand your ground in a way that feels right to you? How can you interrupt the interruption?  How do you handle that meeting where your idea is ignored?




Anne Dargan