What every woman needs to know to succeed - The 101 on Second Generation bias

I get challenged a lot that women are no different from men and shouldn’t be treated any differently. Often not said as politely as this I might add!

I totally get it. What might surprise you is that I actually agree. I too have always wanted to be treated the same.

Years ago I managed large scale software development programmes. I was good at it. I made things happen. I delivered. At one point I had an opportunity to move into a people development role, an opportunity I grabbed with both hands. I was the right decision for me. I was at my best, never happier.

What surprised me was the reaction. Different people went to great lengths to get me back to the delivery role. “You are so good at it,” they said. Or “You are wasted in that people role”.

Even though I was leveraging my talents and strengths and making a bigger difference to the company as a whole, the hard-nosed, aggressive leadership prevalent in the delivery world was valued more highly.

I now realise this was due, at least in part, to what is now termed second generation gender bias. Please read on… this is longer than our normal blog... but you need to know about this.

My first reaction when I heard about it was “what is first generation gender bias?”. I guess the answer was quite obvious. Remember the time when men were considered the breadwinners and women were largely at home or working in support roles? I am reminded of the series Mad Men, smoke filled rooms complete with drinks cabinets with the secretaries organising flowers for ‘Mrs Ad Man’. More recently, I personally remember the edict coming down from on high that photos of naked women were no longer acceptable. Seems like centuries ago.

Unlike the deliberate exclusion of women that was prevalent in the last century, second-generation gender bias is described as “subtle, and often invisible barriers” that are weaved into the fabric of today’s organisations. So subtle, that unless they are pointed out to you, you wouldn’t recognise them. Research highlights four main contributors:

• Organisational Structures and Working Practices that favour men

• Few Women Role Models

• Lack of Access to Networks and Sponsors

• The “double bind”

Organisational structures and working practices that favour men.

Career paths, like ladders, go up sequentially. The time when people are being considered for leadership roles coincides with the time that many women who want children are now thinking about it. The ladder doesn’t provide a rung for this, so women are forced off it (or inadvertently slip off it!)

Another example is the type of work that is valued. Ever notice how people get a pat on the back for their last minute efforts to fix problems? Such heroics are valued in favour of behind the scenes work typically associated with women.

So the cycle continues with men appearing to be better suited to leadership roles and women more suited to support roles.

Few women role models.

How many women are there to look up to? And when we find them, how many do we admire or want to emulate?

OK, there’s Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook and author of ‘Lean In’ (a great read by the way). Apart from writing a book (one of my aspirations) we come from different worlds.

Maggie Thatcher comes to mind! Obviously a great leader, but do I want to emulate that style?

Or more generally, the women that present their success stories at the conferences, who are so successful and haven’t had any challenges that they will admit to? Can I really identify with them? Are they real?

Point is that the scarcity of women role models means the chances of us relating with the few we can name, discourages us from seeing the possibility of becoming a leader.

Lack of access to networks and sponsors.

We all know about the old boys network! Whilst we might jeer at the notion, the fact is that men’s networks provide more informal help than women’s do and, more importantly, men’s networks include the people who have power and influence, the very people who are ideal sponsors.

Fact is that more men are sponsored, whereas more women are mentored. The distinction is an important one. Sponsors differ from mentors in that they advocate for you, put your name forward for that plumb assignment or promotion and defend you when the ‘you know what’ hits the fan. Sponsors are vital to anyone wanting to reach the top of the ladder (if that’s what you want of course). Sponsorship can result in as much as a 30 percent increase in promotions, pay raises and stretch assignments for a protege.

Even if women do get access to a sponsor there are inherent barriers. Should I go for a drink after work with a male sponsor... or have lunch with him... or be seen with him anywhere... what would people would think and say? That’s why men don’t want to sponsor younger women and why younger women don’t want to be sponsored by older men.

Double binds.

This is all about stereotypes of men, women and leaders. The subtle cultural messages that appear in books and newspapers we read, tv, adverts and films we watch condition us to expect men and women and leaders to look a certain way and behave in a certain way.

Women are stereotypically associated with communal qualities like being kind, warm, supportive, compassionate, friendly, inclusive. Men are stereotypically associated with agentic qualites like being resilient, self assured, ambitious, confident and determined. Leaders are stereotypically associated with a lot of the same characteristics as men, thus we automatically think leader, think man.

Women who behave ‘like a leader’, for example they are assertive, authoritative, confident and decisive are not liked, often accused of being “too tough”, “acting like a man” or “being selfish and self promoting”. They are however seen as credible leaders.

Conversely women leaders who act in gender consistent ways are liked, however they are not respected as leaders. This really puts women in a double bind – ‘damned if you do, damned if you don’t’.

Better to do the delivery role, be tough, be seen as a leader but feel awful. Or do a people role, where I didn’t have to act tough anymore, but no longer be seen as credible.

Unfair? Yes. Why do men think like this? Well actually, women think like this too, including YOU. See for yourself by trying out an Implicit Association Test (IAT) which you can find by googling IAT Harvard.

So yes I agree with you. Men and women shouldn’t be treated any differently. But they are. It is nobody’s fault. It’s history, it’s culture, it just is. As change consultants, we know that any organisational culture change needs to be based on sound business outcomes and there needs to be buy-in and commitment at the highest levels. Whilst organisations catch up with the research that shows diversity equals better bottom line results, it is our aim to increase awareness so that you are equipped with what you need to know to succeed.

If you are convinced that there is a business imperative for gender diversity, and want to do something about it, then email us or call us on 028 9269 3194 to help you educate men and women in your organisation.

We can help raise awareness about second generation gender bias and engage your leadership team in open dialogue about how it impacts on people and the organisation.